I Will Not Be Sweet Forever

You tell me
that you love me.
But have you seen
enough of me
to know?

You love me
when I’m sunny
– it’s easy to love
someone like that –
but will you love me
when my walls close in
and I have nowhere
to go?

Do you love
the light I show you,
or will you still be here
in the dark?

When my mountains
crumble
and the waves
crash
against the steady rocks
that hold my heart
breaking down
my barriers
and washing them
into the sea

will you still love
the wreckage
you see?

When I’m not the
cool
collected
person
i try to pretend
I am
but instead
the mess I hide
in corners of my head
shadowed in the darkness
I try to keep at bay

will you still
love me?

Do you mean
what you say?

Do you know the words
you caress me with,
are they familiar to you?
Do they have the comfort
of your mum’s vegetable soup,
warm
and friendly
and true?

I will not
be sweet forever.
In fact,
some days
I am the taste
you wake up with
in the morning
when you really
need a drink
and spend the whole
rest of the day
trying so desperately
to wash out.
But I
linger,
clinging to your
sorry tastebuds
like a limpet.

Will you catch me
in my chaos
or take one look
and walk away?

When I tell you
you’d be better off
if you left,
would you stay?

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